A dead grass streak lay heavy on the porch
No mouth to feed has it borne so far
Bruised by a sprout that he chose for itself
So open so close so widened n lean
Reverence of love stills its woe
Fight it no more for it wails in plea
A roof that it dreamt of turning in to
Tickles him no more...he stares
His chopped arms as though devour his sight
Blind! He finds to his agency aboard
For the lit darkness was lit until
The darkness laid its stings---

I DON'T KNOW !

Every single day, i think of putting my blog to some use...pay some attention to its enduring patience, its drowning desires of being updated, written in and read about...but sparing some from the little time that i have off these poignantly nightmarish days, becomes almost like reading bhagwad geeta or hanuman chalisa on the day before a math exam....however important or rewarding it may be, there is no time for your senses to practice anything else but those dancing numbers and tickling formulae. No, before you even begin to think that i'm some kind of a snob trying to portray a self labelled picture of an Obama for myself, i'd like to be very honestly upright about my laziness, procrastinating habits and sheer detestation for internet and take on all the responsibility of not having written for so long. But I must also mention that blogging to me has never sounded so interesting an idea and for all those whose minds just hammered the question,"why does she have a blog then?", i have a quick answer and that is, "I DON'T KNOW". When i designed my blog i was determined to write on a regular basis, but as evidently visible, that never happened. My blog remained just an online space as a back-up for a few of my poems or writings. Then i grew up(still never wrote) and there was a point when i wanted to revise my blog and make it look and function like a website to facilitate a professional transaction of my writing skills...so, the new look! Neverethelss, my proud tradition of having unscribbled walls still remained undented! For two years now, there have been hardly more than ten posts on my blog; which sucks! It was high time i started writing, blogging, ranting, bitching, brooding or just juggling. So here i am, making my first randomly intuitive post, hoping to continue and consequently enjoy this process of spontaneity. see you!

well.....

Often in the rains when
Splashes acknowledge your feet
You want to gear away
And rooftop on some safer!
Often in the scorch
When “colour” blindfolds your sight
You want to smear a screen
And “ground-in” on a hide
But, what marks a genius
Is the one who cares less
When no rain or heat
Thwarts his leaps
For he refuses to notice!
It’s all in the top most chamber
Of a fully equipped house of POSSIBILITIES...
Learn it.

soon....

Metaphorical undertone that my eyes threw
And caught at every step of its being
Now fades and slaps a retreat
From a former rogue of defeat
A house of pride over blocks of love
Breaks every inch stabbing tons of me
These eyes don’t shut and it pains to see
How I peel off from a gift of thee
I chose to step down...i never choose!
i was up there...i could see
I was glad and eyes had a sparkle
A shine of what made me be
I was clay...
Beautiful, colourful, smooth
And happily shaping for a better form each time
A stone pelted in and stung
Unlike ever, my hands didn’t remove it
I surrendered
Now i land here
At just the place where i began
To place myself in the place i just lost
It’ll be more challenging this time
‘coz i’m heavy...with love
With respect, with goodness
Which i don’t deserve....
I walk the guilt with a view to construct...
Soon.

oops!

I wrote something today and oops! It got deleted…all the glitters and gloss on the texture and language are now but a past as I see them nowhere. I tried to look for it, trace it back if I possibly could, but it lies there where it takes light years to reach; somewhere in some corner of my thinking tools. There’s no coming back now and the yearning fingers are trickling into nothingness as if anxious to touch. A glimpse of this and a pitch of that seldom defy the grief of losing it. Nothing does complete the missing links and nothing can print it back for me. I opted to fashion my possession in a way that brings me appreciation, but who knew it was tagged ‘temporary” (or perhaps I did!) It is important to learn from this now that however carefully you program the sustainability of what belongs to you, it is someday going to walk out on you…for everything that lands is issued a return before it takes off.

In quest of peace

Almost 24 hours ago, I watched ‘Parzania’ and the aftermath is that I’m still shivering. I don’t understand religion, nor do I believe in one; I don’t acknowledge discrimination, but I’m shameful to affirm that I witness a huge some! So what do I do? I asked myself. I knocked a several times at the door of the room that my heart locked itself in, being terrified by the fact that some day (if this continues) perhaps I might have to capitulate to a murder-a cold blooded murder in the name of the very fanciful RELIGION. What then? There was no answer but a long grim silence. I waited for a response; I got one at 3 in the morning and it said, “ save me”. This was no hindu joining hands or no muslim on his knees; this was no sikh bowing down or no christian crossing hands; this was a cry of what has long been forgotten, buried and done with-PEACE. It is a huge term and to come to think of it, it has several interpretations, owing to the fact that we are all ‘differently perceptive’. But honestly it isn’t that difficult to exercise, as all it requires is a sense of understanding. I know I’m talking a language too ideal but giving up is not what we’ve learnt from our ancestors. This is the time for us to work; this is the time to practice our ideals. This is time to identify what’s right and what pretence. Now is the time to stop being fooled. I don’t want to believe that nothing can happen. I don’t want to believe I’m meek in front of the “Powerful Chairs”. I don’t want to believe I will be crushed under their feet. I know what has been happening, but I don’t want to be submissive. Before I die I don’t want to look back and regret the fact that I could have made a difference. I don’t want to pretend that I’m strong, but I don’t want to lose this chance of making an attempt. I have no strategic plans, I have no political indulgence. All I have is a dream and I wish to live it. I’m no philosopher; nor m I a seer. I’m a twenty year old girl and I implore the ones who have a heart, enough to be lent for a purpose so keen, to come forward and attempt to reinforce harmony in a nation that is set on the fire, called hatred and disrespect!